O how foolish is the ignoble revealed in his pursuit of greatness! O how the folly of the mortal in hubris does manifest his own downfall, as he dares for a seat at lavatory of knowledge moste divine! O how you have fallen from the heavens, Lucifer Morningstar, Son of the Dawn, who once did fell nations! etcetera, etcetera...
I was wrong! WRONG! RIGHT! WRONG!
Forgive me my fellow forum members. I have led you astray all this time. Even you, Yuli Ban. This month of April I have made thirty posts, in anticipation that by the time I had reached the final, the financial crisis of which I spoke since I came here would be clear to you all. But the global economy is fine.
Yes, the mighty United States of America is still chugging along at sprightly growth rate of, er, 0.7%. Retail stores are closing at record pace across the country topping levels seen in 2008, but this is fine. US national debt is bordering on twenty trillion and their debt-to-GDP ratio is over 100%, but that's not a problem! President Trump brought the world to the brink of nuclear war twice in just three weeks and investors said "Oh boy, war stocks!" The systemically vital Italian banking system is in meltdown, but don't sweat it! See, stocks have soared for six months straight now under Donald Trump, so, financial crisis? Fuck that noise - praise Kek!
The mistake I made you see, was to assume the people on this planet live on Earth like I do. It turns out however that they live on Neptune, where climate change doesn't exist and the apocalypse is good for business. They do have to come back down to Earth and face the music eventually, but I have given up trying to guess when that will happen, because those guys are fucking high.
My predictions suck. I'll just show myself out. For real, this time. This will be my last post. An apology, for having wasted your time. Nobody needs someone spouting doom while the world is in fact clearly heading for such a bright and sunny future. Thanks everyone - if you'd like to stay in touch PM me about it - but whatever you do, don't take anything I say or do seriously ever, ever again, for I have failed you, and must now depart humbly with my tail between my legs. Just ignore everything I say.
Le Pen will win.